We are so grateful we had the privilege to be matched and meet with our daughter’s first mom prior to her birth.
Going into the adoption process, we had a lot of conversations about the level of “openness” we were comfortable with. Ultimately, we decided we were most comfortable with a semi-open adoption which means we send pictures and letters to the agency and they provide them to the birthmother.
We met her on a weekday for lunch with our CFS caseworker, Jasmine. We were so nervous and excited going into that meeting. Jasmine kept the conversation going and made sure everyone’s questions were answered.
At the end of the meeting, we felt such peace about the match and were overwhelmed by the kindness of Elli’s first mom.
I remember her asking if we needed anything for the baby and that is when it hit me – we were really going to be parents.
Not even one week later, we got the call at church that she was in labor and we needed to come to the hospital. When we arrived, she wanted to meet with us. We are so grateful we were able to share that time learning more about one another. Those conversations are moments we’ve tucked away to share with Elli as she grows.
CFS set us up with a communication agreement outlining the expectations of communication. We share pictures and letters and we keep a duplicate version of each update for Elli to keep when she is older. Elli also received a special gift on her birthday and Christmas from her first mom.
On the post-placement side of our adoption, we are much more comfortable in our “openness” and we believe that is because of the relationship we were able to make with her first mom.
There is not a day that passes when we don’t wonder how her first mom is doing or add a photo from the day to the album for the next update.
– Zeke & Sunshine, Adoptive Parents