Adoption and the Birth Mother

It seems like adoption is straightforward: Single woman has an unplanned pregnancy; woman doesn’t want him/her; Man and Woman want a newborn adoption; Woman gives her child to Man and Woman; a Forever Family is formed.

If you are already part of an adoption triad or work in the adoption field, you are probably cringing at this point! (And the rest of you are wondering why they are cringing.)

It’s because that thought process is full of inaccurate statements and adoption myths. The truth and reality is that Adoption is nowhere near that simple. The world of adoption is a complicated, intricate, emotional, loving, heartbreaking and beautiful world.

Adoption in Florida is not only about single, or even unmarried women who reach out to agencies for unplanned pregnancy help. Some expectant mothers have loving and devoted boyfriends, fiancés and husbands who choose this option. Some women and couples may even have other children they are currently raising.

Adoption is not about a woman not wanting her baby. If “wanting” were all it took to raise a child, these women would not be going down this road. An expectant mom’s current life circumstance may make raising a child difficult, and like all parents, birth moms want the absolute best for their child. They want them to have what they can’t provide, whether that means financial stability, a safer home, or two parents. They may want to make sure their other children don’t “suffer” the financial strain they may be under if they raise another child.

Placing a child for adoption is not a mother being selfish or “giving up her baby.” Adoption is about a woman weighing her options and considering the future for the child she is carrying. She, indeed, is selfless.