Is Adoption “giving a baby up”?

Take a moment and place yourself in the “shoes” of a woman with an unplanned pregnancy. What would your options be? Can you imagine the initial shock, fear and worry as you say to yourself, “I’m Pregnant”!?

Imagine what it’s like to have people around you telling you to raise your baby. They freely share with you “that’s the only option” or “you can’t just give away your baby” or “you made your bed, now you gotta lie in it.” Maybe they would make you feel guilty about “giving baby up for adoption.” Maybe people offer you what you know are empty promises. You desperately want to believe them but you have been burnt too many times to actually believe them.

Or maybe they, along with media and our society, are telling you to “just have an abortion.” They do not consider (or offer to help with) the emotional and physical toll that procedure has on a woman. They tell you it is a quick and easy fix and you can just move on.

Then again, maybe nobody is saying anything or offering pregnancy help. Nobody is checking in on you or offering love or support in your new status 

of expectant mother. They are leaving you completely alone in your decision.

Now I want you to imagine choosing life. Imagine your baby growing, living and moving inside you for nine months. Your stomach grows, your hormones create emotional mood swings, and your body experiences all the typical side effects of pregnancy. You feel your baby kicking. You see ultrasounds of your baby growing. You hear your baby’s heartbeat. You discover if you are having a daughter or a son. You worry if he or she is/will be healthy. Can you picture this? Can you imagine the love and connection with your baby, before he or she is even born?

Now imagine after nine months of loving, caring for and living with your baby every second of every day, you choose to place your infant for adoption. You decide that you love your baby so much you want him or her to have the best life possible, even if that means it’s not with you, even if that means you not getting to raise your own child or watch him or her grow up.

At some point during your pregnancy, or maybe even after giving birth, you contact an adoption agency. You meet with a caseworker. You make an adoption plan. You consider closed or open adoption. You choose the parents who will raise your child. Do you think you would make that decision lightly or on a whim?

Do you still think these moms are just “giving away their babies” because they “don’t want them?”

Would you have the love, strength and bravery to choose adoption for your child?